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Pleasant Company EP

by Laurie Ray

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1.
i wanna be useful but i'm useless i wanna be careful but i'm careless i wanna be myself but i can't look my own reflection in the eye is it time to go? i don't wanna leave my home can't go alone, please i need a hand to hold i fear that when you leave you'll never come back home to me i leave a message at the tone and i wish i never picked up my phone i still believe in all the pretty things in this world i still see your smile and your misty grey eyes the way you looked when i called your name and it's all just clear blue skies i still believe that i can be anything yeah, i know, i'm the cliche queen, now, aren't i? i still believe that this is where i'm supposed to be and don't you dare don't you dare take this away from me i still believe in all the pretty things in this world i still see your smile and your misty grey eyes the way you looked when i called your name and it's all just clear blue skies once upon a time in a faraway venue i took the stage and the lights shone in my eyes and i thought "hey, maybe this is what i'm supposed to do with my life." Is this how my fairytale ends? with my finding my destiny i still really don't believe in destiny i still believe in all the pretty things in this world i still see your smile and your misty grey eyes the way you looked when i called your name and it's all just clear blue skies
2.
Smile, Smile 03:46
you looked me in the eyes with your blue eyes like oceans and you told me the biggest lie "it's not your fault," but it was and we both knew it your hand reached for mine to provide some comfort but your hands, they've outgrown my own so you'll smile, smile even though you don't mean it there are miles, miles to go before you are sleeping and try, try to keep from slipping you'll get where you going if you don't look back your compass pointed north so you followed it's directions without question you pack your bags and you leave you leave nothing behind except me you pack your bags and you leave you leave nothing behind except me so i'll smile, smile even though i don't mean it there are miles, miles between our towns now that i feel it try, try to keep from slipping you'll get where you going if you don't look back don't look back ocean blue eyes tell the prettiest lies full of promises of flowers and better days but here i am and you pack your bags and you leave you leave nothing behind except me
3.
If I let down mine Will you let down yours? I promise to filter nothing And to open all my doors I’m proud of you, y’know Proud of what you did Not everyone remembers how to be open After they’ve hid I’ve had my walls up and had my doors closed I don’t remember why I even use those Ah, but for most It’s a struggle, y’know to find the person who can help take your mask off Why did you hide? I completely understand Not everyone gets it Not everyone can You were hiding from judgement Hiding from the lies Hiding from all those who might’ve said “You’re going to hell when you die” Oh, but if that’s true Then it won’t just be you You’ll have quite a lot of pleasant company You told your dad After being scared for years And he hugged you and shed happy tears He said “I’ve always known, and I love you” And nothings been bad ever since between the two of you And if I haven’t said it Well, I’m sayin’ it now People who love you won’t mind People who you don’t need in your life will But you’ll be okay Just get out there and say “I love who I love” And that’s how you’ll end it today That’s how you’ll end it today Why did you hide? I completely understand Not everyone gets it Not everyone can You were hiding from judgement Hiding from the lies Hiding from all those who might’ve said “You’re going to hell when you die” Oh, but if that’s true Then it won’t just be you You’ll have quite a lot of pleasant company Oooooo ahhh oh I love who I love and that’s how it’ll stay
4.
I’ve fallen in love with the moon Her silver light enchanted me and took me home But she, she overlooked me And she pulled my heart like the sea Push, pull, longing, forgetting, taking, releasing She does not know that I am here She does not know how enchanting she is She does not know that I love her heart even though it has tears She seems to get smaller and smaller, thinner and thinner Until one day, she just won’t be here Ah, but then she’ll come back And she’ll be full and I will be able to see every part she’s hidden from me She noticed me and said "Come hither" I said "Darling, I cannot, My heart is for you, but my feet are chained to the ground" And then, she withered away She does not know that I am here She does not know how enchanting she is She does not know that I love her heart even though it has tears She seems to get smaller and smaller, thinner and thinner Until one day, she just won’t be here Ah, but then she’ll come back And she’ll be full and I will be able to see every part she’s hidden from me But she’ll be back It’s just a part of this cycle Of coming and going Full and hidden She’ll come back, because she’s given me her heart And now, her heart is tied to mine Like I was to begin What a confusing knot we’ve got ourselves tied in The push and pull is equal My feet are chained to the ground And she is caught in the clouds And our hearts are tied to each other She knows that I am here But my feet are chained to ground and she is caught in the clouds our hearts are tied to each other What a confusing knot we’ve got ourselves tied in
5.
I fear for myself I fear for this place I fear that the rain will drown me I fear that I will be replaced I fear the thunder and the lightning listen to me loud and clear take a deep breath and stand a bit taller, dear make a deal with the monster under your bed trade your childish fears for bigger ones instead hide from the politician, the preacher, your family, and your friends won’t you miss the monster under your bed? That takes over your mind? and controls your head? won’t you the monster that lives under your bed? you think you’ll be alright you can make it through another night but something in the back of your head asks you “is that right?” can you really be ok after this with no hand to hold no face to kiss can you really make it through this? the world is so cold and lonely without anyone to call yours only this wasn’t in the bargain, was it? you made a deal with the monster under your bed you traded your childish fears for bigger ones instead now you’re hiding from the politician, the preacher, your family, and your friends don’t you miss the monster under your bed? Who controlled your mind and took over your head you sure do miss the monster that used to live under your bed
6.
gather yourself up in the bathroom gather your wits gather them about you you can't leave just yet although you really want to try and get this makeup off my face I didn't want to wear it in the first place eye linear burns my eyes as I start to cry again it'll alright it'll be just fine just try and make it through tonight when you get home you can cry they don't know what you're going through they wouldn't know even if they tried to leave the bathroom in haste and try to hide your tear stained face y'see, there's always been something wrong with this place there's always been something wrong here maybe that's why I feel so out of place maybe I'll find a place where I belong I'm so sick of it oh so sick of it it's time for a change I'm tired of being labelled I'm tired of being pushed away tired of being at the bottom of the food chain I'm so sick of this I'm , i'm so sick I'm so, i'm so sick of this it's time for a change gather yourself up gather yourself up gather yourself up gather yourself up you will gather yourself up
7.

credits

released July 8, 2014

Maia Schneburger for Violin, Athieno Ngowe for bass.

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Laurie Ray Decatur, Georgia

Singer/songwriter from Decatur, GA

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